Tired

It's been a week since I've posted last, but it sure hasn't been for lack of subject matter!  With all the stuff surrounding Copenhagen, there's almost too much to keep up with!

The last little while, though, I've just been feeling tired, tired, tired.  Too tired to write.  Too tired to think clearly.  Too tired to keep on top of things.  It doesn't help that my husband has been ill a lot lately, so I'm rather concerned about him, too.  He's been put on a new cocktail of meds to try and control his blood sugars, since his body has been doing the opposite of what it's "supposed" to do.  So there's a whole new batch of side effects to deal with.  His back gave out on him again, and the pain is so bad it makes him dizzy and nauseous - which just happens to also be some the side effects of his medications.  He just got a refill of meds for his back, which actually do help, but wipes him out.  When he got his refill he was told to take it three times a day, which he's NEVER been able to do.  Just taking one knocks him out for the day, so he tries to take them only just before bed.  The dr. wanted to give him something else for his back, too, but with the side effects of that drug, on top of the side effects of the others, he didn't think that would be a good idea. 
At least these latest drugs are actually covered by his insurance plan, and he doesn't have to pay up front and submit receipts for reimbursal.

Meanwhile, there just doesn't seem to be an end to the things that need to get done, and the way I'm feeling, they just don't get done at all.  We were supposed to take a group photo last weekend, so I could use it to make up a Christmas e-card to send out, which we've been doing every year since moving away from family.  I was assured we'd get it done, but when the weekend came, nothing happened.  We've actually been meaning to get a new group photo for some time now, as the only ones we have are about a year old.  When the time comes, though, it just doesn't happen. 

I still haven't finished putting up Christmas decorations around the house.  I'd intended to make the place look more festive, but just can't seem to gather the energy to do it.  It doesn't help that I seem to be the only one that's even interested, since the tree's been put up.  Eldest did some decorating while I was out with Youngest and did a great job of it, but nothing's been done since.  Well, unless you count taping things to a door to replace something I had to take down.  I've got strings of lights I want to put around windows, but don't have the energy to clamber around shelves, onto chairs, or over counters.  I've got garlands I wanted to hang at various places around the main floor, etc. and it's just not happening.  I tried to get into the spirit of things by playing Christmas music. Thanks to my sister, I even have some Polish carols I remember from my childhood.  My husband, however, has a habit of mocking songs.  He means to be funny, playing around with the lyrics and stuff (and is really quite creative at it), but it totally ruins the songs for me.  I'd rather not play the songs at all than have them lampooned like that.  I get the impression he really, really hates Christmas music.

I need to figure out a menu for our Wigilia dinner.  Every since we've lived in this province, we've been celebrating Wigilia on Christmas Eve instead of Reveillion after midnight, as we'd done at Dh's parents every year before the move.  Today I brought it up, as I need to plan my grocery shopping.  Youngest looked at me blankly, having no idea what I was talking about (I guess she'd forgotten the name?) and Dh "corrected" me by saying "Reveillion?"  How can we have celebrated Christmas with Wigilia for 3 years in a row, and neither of them remembers?

I'm starting to really not look forward to planning the menu.  Eldest and I both would like to try something different.  She'd like to have a fish dish - which would actually be much more traditional, since Wigilia is supposed to be a meatless meal.  I'd have liked to try a goose.  Dh won't eat fish, though, and his reaction when I mentioned a goose was ... less than positive.  More like stunned that I would even suggest such a thing. :-P  I have no idea what Youngest would like, because she doesn't contribute any ideas or opinions at all. I end up feeling like I'm trying to coerce everyone, and it shouldn't be that way.  If I *don't* say anything, though, no one else will step up to the plate.  Sometimes, I feel like we could forget Christmas completely, and no one would notice. 


Bah.  I probably shouldn't write at all when I'm feeling tired like this.  Friggin' depressing.  A good night's sleep and some iron in my blood will probably go a long way to me feeling better about the whole thing. :-P  Not that the problems would go away.  They just wouldn't bug me as much.


Time to see if there's any red meat in the fridge I can eat. ;-)